Takin' a look at the start of the year...Joe Ortiz is the man, he really looks like one of those cartoon bulldogs. In 8 2/3 IPs he's sporting a 0.692 WHIP, the only walk being intentional. A stable, consistent bullpen is really looking like the key to the season. It's a pitching/defense team, last nite they won without an extra base hit, something they did twice all of last season...The A's are legit, but the great Yo Enis! is on the 15 day DL after an awkward slide messed up his fingers. Seth Smith is just a professional hitter...Angels have been awful. Josh has been pressing and swingin' at everything, but he did park one last nite. Him and Trout have yet to get going, but that pitching is so mediocre at best that it might not matter. If they can't hold on 'til Weaver gets back, they'll be buried.

The AL Central has been so blah. Detroit will win it because they have Miggy, Prince, and JV. They have no idea how they're gonna close games at this point, but hey there's only 150 games left...KC is playing decent with a combined ZERO HRs from Hosmer, Moustakas, Gordon, and Perez. Perez is one of the handful of guys I'd consider trading Profar for, and I'd hate it but then love it. He's like a Pudge/Charles Johnson combo...Everyone's favorite announcer, Terry Francona, has the Tribe a half game back. They're getting nothing from Asdrubal, but Mark Reynolds is pounding it and Masterson has been pitching like an ace. Bourn and Swisher have been as advertised, and Stubbs has been K'ing at an alarming rate.

The East is kinda playing in reverse, so far, with Tampa and Toronto sitting on the bottom. But it's all so close and so early that nothing is really standing out. Chris Davis has started the year with a bang, carrying Baltimore along with Adam Jones. The thing with CD is that pitch recognition, so far he's got 7 BBs. If he can stay selective, he can be a star. That Oriole rotation, though looks like shit...Yanks'll probably stick around all year despite injuries to Teixeira, Granderson, and A-Rod. The division is that meh...Boston sits atop the division, getting 2 bombs from Napoli but not much else. Koji has been near perfect in 4 1/3 IPs, and Lester and Bucholz are carrying the staff...Toronto was a heavy preseason pick, but Jose Reyes gonna be out for a while messin' up his ankle.

The NL has been fun. The Braves are rollin', off to a 10-1 start behind the bop of  Justin Upton and the NL's version of Josh Hamilton, Evan Gattis. Gattis is a local guy, growing up in Forney and playing ball there, Carrollton R.L. Turner, and Dallas Bishop Lynch. He was supposed to play at A&M, but got anxiety and self-medicated with drugs and alcohol. From there he went all over the place, working at a pizza joint in Colorado, janitorial work in Dallas, and Yellowstone Park in Wyoming. Got back into ball in 2010 at UT-Permian Basin, managed to get selected in the 23rd round, and with Brian McCann being injured made the big club outta Spring Training this year. In his second big league AB, he homered off of Roy Halladay...Bryce Harper been carrying Washington with 5 HRs and a 1.157 OPS, dude is a beast. Such a violent swing...The Mets are hanging tough behind phenom Matt Harvey, 3-0 0.82 ERA 10.2 K/9 0.545 WHIP. John Buch has 6 HRs, carrying the offense...Phillies being led by Ranger legend Michael Young's .368/.442/.553...Stupid, fuckin' Cardinals are, shocker here, leading the Central. Hate them. Wainwright's good...The West is jam-packed with the Giants holding a half game lead over 3 teams.

Yoga pants.
Norah Jones.
Spring dresses.